Mother's Day

It just hit me this week that this is my first Mother's Day without my own mother.

I've always felt somewhat ambiguous about Mother's Day. I guess that is because in my family growing up, my own mom never wanted it celebrated with much fanfare. It was on a Mother's Day that her own mom deserted her and her brother. As the story goes, her mom sent the two of them to a movie and when they returned, there was a letter on the mantle, saying "I've stayed with you long enough and have gone to live my own life" or words to that effect. My mom was 17 and her brother 14. Can kind of sour the sentiment of a day honoring your mom for you.

It feels to me like one of those "Hallmark holidays" ....I'd much rather have my kids call me regularly and express their love and appreciation for me in small ways throughout the year than make a big deal on one arbitrary day. Not that I'm one for turning down a brunch or dinner or a little pampering.

And I have to admit, I get confused on this day...do we honor our mothers or should I be honored?We've always lived near my husband's mom and she seems to like the day, so we will usually do something with her, which is fine with me, especially since it was never a big deal for my own mom.

I think my favorite Mother's Day was when the boys were young, about 3 and 6 and we went to Valley Forge Park. We picked up a picnic lunch of sushi; put some kites, a blanket, and a chair for my mother in law in the car. We planted ourselves in a field in the park, flew the kites and enjoyed the beautiful weather and each others company. No hype, no stress...just a perfect sky, a simple meal and a day with those I love. Now that is Mother's Day.